Days 485-487

Hello good kingdom folk.

So I wanna lay something on yall. Not about work, even though I got words about work, and not about weight loss, nope all about my boyfriend.

So, my boyfriend is really sweet. He says I'm the most gorgeous and cute and stuff that makes me blush...if I could blush, but that's besides the point. We were on the conversation about sex. And even though we talk about it all the time as far as likes and dislikes and what we want to do in the future, he knows that I want to wait until marriage. Not because of religious stuff anymore, bc i'm agnostic and I could have thrown it away, but because I don't like risks and he respects it.

Now we been talking about stuff not considered sex and it kinda gets me in my feelings. Not in a bad way, but in a naughty way. The fact that he respects me enough to not push it on me is super great and at the same time, if I bring up doing it, he's definitely gonna be like "you sure about this?" and that is kinda where we are...

I had a change of heart about religion earlier this year bc stuff just didn't add up for me and so I went from Christian to Agnostic. I can't tell ppl how to do with their personal beliefs but I highly suggest research in your spare time so that you can live your life. In all honesty, I've looked up so much stuff on sex. The minute I get a clear answer about it pertaining to history and the oldest ideals of sex I can decide to do sex before marriage, but until then, I'm comfortable with sex AFTER marriage, and he's willing to wait as well because he cares about my choice.

We are currently on the stuff not pertaining to penetration and so tonight, at my overnight shift, I will be doing just that, looking up stuff on the internet. I have stuff i'm willing to do and not to do, and so it's a matter of acting on it when we meet up at conventions or our personal time (since it's long distance). I'm going on 29 and for any reason our relationship don't work out (which we believe will be eons to come bc it's been a great year) I am capping the sex deal at 35. At the point where we don't work out, and it'd have to be detrimental, I think I will give up on it, because I will have lost patience with it.

I actually feel great getting this out. I feel comfortable finally letting loose. Take time to think about this stuff before just acting on it. It's your body, treat it with respect before interacting with someone else's. Until next post...good night fam.